In my book, Lost in Place, Mark Salzman has a sensei named O’Keefe. I know for a fact that Mark is petrified of his master, but at the same time he looks up to him and has the up most respect for him as a teacher of kung-Fu. His fear of his own master was so bad at first that he would kind of dread going to the classes. He dealt with his fear by focusing on his goals of becoming a monk. He believed that this is the training he needed and that was expected from the art of Kung-Fu.
The biggest fear I have right now, is failing the bridge program. I don’t have a way to deal with it or know how to exactly overcome my fear. Well....The more I think about it, the only time I calm down and find peace is when I cover my fear with confidence. Just last night, myself and 2 other friends were freaking out for about an hour. I pretty much assumed that I was getting kicked out of the program. I’ve heard too many things about how they are crackin’ down on students who are not improving. I’m not saying that I myself feel like I’m not improving….Trust me, I know for a fact that I’m improving in my reading and writing. Just coming to English for the bridge program, I improved so much. I think I’m petrified that I know that I’m improving but if I can’t show it in my papers then it doesn’t matter whether I say I am or not.
All I know is, is that, even though we were told that if we make it past week two then we are pretty much okay, eff that. I’m going to work my ass off like the past two weeks and not slack for a second. Maybe I’ll loosin’ up when I’m presenting my final project to the class. Also, for anyone who has the same fear as I do about the bridge program…..DON’T SLACK OFF FOR A SECOND!
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